Good Will Hunting, directed by Gus Van Sant
"This girl's like perfect right now. I don't want to ruin that."
“Maybe you're perfect right now, maybe you don't wanna ruin that. You know, I think that's a super philosophy, Will. That way you can go through your entire life without ever having to really know anybody... my wife used to fart when she was nervous. She had all wonderful sorts of idiosyncrasies. She used to fart in her sleep. Scared the shit out of me. One night it was so loud it woke the dog up. She'd woken up and gone like, 'oh is that you?' I said, yeah. I didn't have the heart to tell her.”
“She woke herself up?”
“Yeah. Oh, Christ.. wonderful stuff, you know. Little things like that. Those are the things I miss the most... the little idiosyncrasies only I knew about. That's what made her my wife. Oh, and she had the goods on me too. She knew all my little peccadilloes. People call these things imperfections, but they're not. Oh, that's the good stuff. And then we get to choose who we let into our weird little worlds. You're not perfect, sport. And let me save you the suspense; this girl you met? She isn't perfect either. But the question is, whether or not you're perfect for each other? That's the whole deal, that's what intimacy's all about. Now you can know everything in the world, sport, but the only way of finding out that one is by giving it a shot.”
Perfection is a very abstract term, one that can not always be given a proper definition other than 'free of flaw', although I find this to be an equally abstract explanation of the word. Sean Maguire, in speaking to Will Hunting, delves into the idea that the better you get to know and love somebody, the more apparent their flaws become to you: but rather than come to find yourself annoyed with these flaws, you learn to love them. Not being afraid to show people these flaws are the things that will create a stronger bond and more intimate relationship. We all have flaws, odd little quirks that we possess but it is comforting when we're able to let others see this quirky, flawed side.
There are some people who believe that not all flaws are ones worth sharing or celebrating. They may be irritated perhaps, at the idea that the closer you become to someone, the more willing you are to show them all the negative aspects of yourself, not recognizing it as an opportunity to better understand the person they are and to love them despite their flaws.
To Will, the girl he's speaking of appears entirely perfect to him and so he's frightened to get to know her any better, for fear of discovering her flaws and them ruining his hopes about her. This is a legitimate fear, but also one that must be pushed through because if this is how you were to approach every possible relationship, be it romantic or simply companionable, you would never truly get to know or love anybody.
Flaws are an inevitable part of being human and you have to accept them for what they are: small idiosyncrasies that we will eventually grow to love and miss terribly if they were to disappear: Sean, in speaking of his wife, who passed away two years ago from cancer, and her little idiosyncrasies, says, “She's been dead two years and this is the stuff I remember.” And it's true: the little eccentric imperfections are, more often than not, the things we are able to recall, with a smile, about those who are gone, rather than the 'perfect' parts of their life...
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